A Start – April to May 2024
I launched the Miles 2 Go website blog in April 2024 and posted my last item that year on May 15, 2024. A 6-week flurry of activity that felt so good. I was diving into something that was one of my life goals.
A year earlier, in June 2023, I retired at age 75 (I am a slow learner). So, a year later, I was somewhat settled into a new rhythm of life. I was now ready to ‘hit it’ as a writer. Several items just flowed out of me into Miles 2 Go. Then, 6 weeks later . . . it all dried up.
A Fresh Start – May 25, 2025
In mid-May 2025 we relocated to our little cabin for the summer. In a burst of good intentions, with a captivating contemporary issue (‘one-boat one-lake), I wrote a draft of Just because I could – a thing called power. To affirm that I was rolling again, I sent the reflection to two of my fans (about 50% of my fan club). They regularly encouraged me to get out of my writer’s drought. So I needed to tell them I was back ‘on the road’ again.
How do I say this nicely . . .? ‘A Fresh Start’ lasted one day. Thursday May 25, 2025. I did not review and edit Just because I could for publishing on Miles 2 Go. It lay in its embryonic state along with other items awaiting further attention.
I have no explanation for why I stalled again. My loyal encouragers continued to do their part. New ideas kept flowing in my head almost on a daily basis. I laid out many notes as germ thoughts for expansion. Perhaps, if I had majored in psychology in my undergraduate degree instead of English Literature, I would have some semblance of explanation for my dilemma. And yet, I had majored in English specifically because I thought it spoke more fully than did psychology to the overall human condition. So, as they say, ‘Go figure.’
There is a second level of tragedy in having ‘the wheels come off’ something you want so desperately to accomplish. That is, how easy it was to just accept the change, the loss, the doldrum. And then go on day to day with noble intentions to resurrect the muse, crawl out of the ditch, fix the flat, and get rolling again. Noble intentions but no active behavior to actually make that happen. Instead, an ongoing internal dialogue of intellectualizing and philosophizing about my state of malaise. Some people call it contemplating your navel.
Now, if that picture looks rather pathetic, which it is, I am not finished documenting my slow slide into mediocrity.
Another of my post-retirement life goals was to learn to play the piano. And, during that first year of freedom from work, I had a good run at it. Although finding my way slowly, somewhat as a child in Kindergarten, I could still feel the joy of a new opportunity for personal expression. But just a few weeks after the May 15, 2024, blowout, I lost another wheel. You could say I woke up one morning and found it quite natural and easy to simply look at the keyboard from a distance as if it was someone I used to know. [I think there is song with that title]. It is beyond me to explain why and how that happens.
But, thankfully, that was not the end of either story. I re-engaged with music some months later (and will write about that journey elsewhere). And, as almost a year had passed since my May 2025 blowout, I began to search for any latchkey that would open the gate to a new flow.
As happens with so many pivot points in life, my need was met through the gift of community. The presence of others in my life who were convinced I had something to say and should get on with saying it. I liken my resurrection to the principles expressed in the Alcoholics Anonymous program, a core element being the power of accountability. This intervention, which in essence is an act of love, gave me the boost to stop merely looking at the Miles 2 Go tab on my computer and start actually hitting the button to open the site.
So here I am –
A New Fresh Start! – January 13, 2026
Today I edited Just because I could. Ha! The connection just hit me. I did it ‘just because I could!’ Very timely for that to be the piece on the table. There may be some delay in publishing it. I feel the need to review and restructure the categories of headings for content in the website. Will see how that goes.
Oh yes, I also spent a few minutes looking at I started writing poetry today. Something I wrote a few years ago. Can’t even remember the stimulus for that one. It’s been sitting in Drafts for quite a while. I kind of like it as is. Not being a poet, I don’t know how to assess when a poem is done. So will likely publish it soon and see what my fan club thinks.
Here’s hoping this isn’t just a little blip of creative activity on a path full of sorrow, guilt and regret. I’m almost hesitant to publish any new items. I fear that I may fall again. And even lose the zeal of my little community of encouragement. Hang in there team! Don’t give up on me.